my thoughts on happiness.

what's happier than that!? an angel baby with sunshine pouring down. too sweet

I only recently mustered up the courage to tell people about this here blog. It is scary to show people my vulnerable thoughts and feelings, and I fear the rejection of others. While I've always been the uncool kid (you can read about that here), I've also realized that I am not always comfortable in my own identity like I appear to be. But then again, who is!? For the most part, I'm proud of my "off the beaten path" -ness. but there are some days when I just tear myself up or try to change. I generally don't care what people think at all, but I'm still learning this lesson more and more with each passing day. I'm getting better...which is why I now have enough courage to share this blog. it's still  crazy scary. but then, I just figured it's their loss if they don't like it! So I told a few of my new awesome church friends (good lord yes! good church friends!! hahaha) about my blog... After perusing through some posts, my friend meg asked me,  "How are you so joyful?" So I mulled over that question for a while. 

hmmmmm What is joy? where can we find it? and why does everyone want it?

many different answers to these questions are thrown at us everyday. I decided to compile a list of reasons for joy. more specifically, a list of how I maintain joy in my own everyday life. I know it's cliche and definitely all stuff we've all heard before, but it's on my mind so here it goes. 

1. it's a choice. My mom always told me that joy was a choice. She said that everyday you wake up, you have a decision: happy or sad. While I absolutely hated this little statement when I was in a bad mood on the way to middle school, it rocks. I only hated it cause I knew it was true deep down.

2. it's about pumping the brakes. People are often so close to joy, and all they need is literally a "renovation of thoughts" (like in this post). When you slow down and take time to smell the roses and spend some personal time alone, you literally enjoy life more. Admittedly, this is a hard one for me.

3. it's training your thoughts. Sometimes you just think rotten thoughts. We all do it. You can't let this little monster inside of you tangle your emotions and trick you into thinking these things! First you must acknowledge these bad thoughts, then you must annihilate them like nobody's business. Become aware of these thoughts. stop them in their tracks, rewind them, and remake them into something beautiful. Remember that everything has a flip side.

the little girl I babysit with one of her "pets"

4. it's the little things. sisters to make you laugh, ella dressing herself, robert playing the piano, spontaneous dance parties, grannie's cooking, cookie break in the dining hall, morning runs, freshly shaved legs, pretty jewelry, awesome friends, early morning kayaking to watch the sunrise, homemade christmas decorations, random songwriting sessions, Eucharistic adoration, or meeting new people. simply put, when you cherish the awesome inside of these small things, you realize just how awesome the big things are. A good practice for helping you realize these gifts is to journal about it each day or even just make lists.

5. it's about going with the flow. don't let little issues or hardships hold you hostage. they are a waste of time and the best at stealing your joy. I sometimes get caught up in these pointless things of little importance only to realize how much time I had wasted and how much joy I had shut out from my life. kick back, relax, and don't worry yourself with small problems. Usually they will blow over and not mean anything after a short time

my younger sister annie. she always knew how to make me smile. hilda and greta

6. it's a smile. Anything from a simple smile or to saying hello to someone in the dining hall will do. It'll make you feel good for uplifting others, and it will make you not focus on your own lack of joy. By trying to give others joy, you will subconsciously receive some for yourself.

7. it's about faking it until you make it. From someone who wears her emotions on her sleeve but tries to constantly deny them and/or hide them, sometimes you just feel like you simply cannot be joyful. These are the days when you just have to fake it. Eventually, the happiness will turn true and seep into your every pore without you even realizing it. But when faking it is just hard, revert to number 2, but not for too long.

8. it's being thankful. when you are grateful, everything is an awesome gift to be cherished. Who couldn't be happy with an awesome gift!? Everything becomes the best of the best.

9. it's all about Jesus! Jesus wants you to be happy. When you do everything for the glory of God, you realize that it never really was about you. So often our unhappiness is rooted in selfishness. When we only think about ourselves and our problems, it's impossible to be happy! We must ask Jesus to help us in our quest for a happy life. In "Heaven Speaks to Young Adults" one of my favorite little books to have lying around, Jesus says the following about happiness:

 "As a follower of Jesus Christ the Returning King, you are entitled to joy. ... If you are not joyful, you are spending too much time on worldly thinking. Think in terms of heaven and you will feel joy. Should a soul who is surrounded by angels be dismayed? Should a soul who walks in the constant presence of Jesus Christ be sad and fearful? My loving smile is in your soul. I hold only good wishes for you. ...Sit peacefully now in this moment and allow me to calm you. I send My strength into your soul. I send you great trust in Me and in My presence. I am with you right now. ... I do not leave My friends when troubles come. Rather I give more graces. ... I am the only true security. Rely on me and you will find that your anxiety begins to diminish. Soon it will disappear because I will take it away. Ask Me for this. And then trust Me. Many great saints spent their lives working on trust. you will get better and better at trusting Me through practice. And your fears will get smaller and smaller. Those who live in unity with Me are at peace. The world cannot touch them because their sights are set on the next world, their true home, which is heaven." 

It's such a long passage but truly so comforting. It really is all about Jesus, my friends!! Faith is kind of like the roux (for all my new clemson friends, if you aren't sure of what that is-- check it out here). In a gumbo, it doesn't matter how good of ingredients you have or how awesome your recipe may be if your roux isn't good. It's the base. It's the first and very imperative step to succeed in the gumbo. You see dear readers, you can follow any number of these recipes for joy. but without Jesus as your roux or base, it will be much more difficult to succeed in your endeavors for joy. And you can take that to the bank. 

susan's bike. just cause this picture makes me happy.

I know these are all things that are wayyyyy easier said than done, but prayer is a powerful tool! "Ask and you shall receive"... I know that prayer is also a hard thing to do. But they go hand in hand. Work at it, and God will provide. I went through a rough time where I felt as if all my joy was 100% fake. looking back, it probably was because I had little to no relationship with Jesus. Sounds silly, but it's so true!

Sorry if this post got too long/religious on you my dear friends! There is so much in my brain that I feel like I'm not even doing my thoughts justice. but I like to keep my posts very light-hearted and not so cliche (I'm aware that I'm not succeeding this time...) these were just some thoughts I had to express. 

have a joyous day my friends! and if you aren't, simply ask Jesus if you can borrow his smile!